Thursday, April 8, 2010

I'm a mother of a Toddler

Are you a mother of a toddler?  Is your life a roller coaster ride like mine?
One day Z can be pleasant and fun.  We play, laugh and he brings me such joy.
The next day, sometimes the next minute, he can have me pulling out my hair.  I feel like I am constantly  disciplining him and by nap time or bed time, I am exhausted!   
That's life for me as a mother of a toddler!

So when Nonnie and Poppie (my in-laws) offer to take Z for the weekend, how can I refuse?  Some quiet time (if Marin is not crying), being able to do some reading, cleaning or just sitting instead of running after a 3 year old. Sounds so nice!  I might even do some baking!
But today, as I was saying good-bye to my son, I found myself holding back tears.  Now I know he is in great hands.  He was SO excited to go to Nonnie and Poppies' house and my in-laws love him so much. He will have so much fun, be so loved and well taken care of.  I have no worries with that.  But at the moment I watched their car pull away, I missed my little boy.  I keep hearing him say "Mommy, are you coming to Nonnie and Poppie's house too?"  uugghhh, my heartstrings!  Of course he didn't seem upset at all when I told him I was going home, but it still struck at my heart.

So here I sit at home, thinking about him.  Oh, I am enjoying the quiet, but in a way it seems too quiet.  That boy is just a part of me.  I would do anything for him.  And I just can't wait to wrap my arms around him on Sunday when he comes home.  I just can't imagine what my life would be like without him and my heart weeps for those who experience that.  There are just no words.

That's the thing about being a mom.  I wouldn't change it for anything.  Yes, I have days of craziness, exhaustion and frustration, but it is all worth it.  I love my kids.  I love my husband.  I love my life.  Even on those "days, I love my toddler with an unconditional love.  His smile warms my heart.  His laugh makes me smile, and his witty way with words leaves me speechless. 

I will enjoy this time.  I will get lots of things done around this house.  I plan to do some fun things with my little girl.  But I can't wait till Sunday, when my family will be back together again.  
I love my life with my toddler, as roller-coaster like as it is!
I love my life!  Thank you, Jesus!

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